Melodydream

[melodydream]

||| MELODYDREAM |||

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#Name; Melodydream
#Age Group ; Older Teen
#Gender ; Female
#Species; Pegasus
#Cutie Mark ; Feather quill and music note
#Occupation ; Writes songs
#Powers and Abilities ; Good at singing and song writing, and a decent flyer

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#Physique ; Average height, small muzzle, and thick torso.
#Mane and fur color and style ; Magenta Fur and curly black and white mane and tail
#Eye color ; Bright blue
#Other appearance details (optional) ; Small freckles on face. Average height.

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#Personality ;

Melody is a bit of an introvert. She is very quiet, and appears shy to most ponies. However, she isn't so with anyone she is close to or when singing. Although she has a very good singing voice, she prefers to write songs for other ponies. She is a bit of a dreamer, always very in-tune with her emotions and memories. She used these to help her write meaningful songs that ponies could connect with. Even though she was quite shy, she loved attending social events and watching ponies interact with one another. She heard music in everything and was always finding ways to incorporate everyday sounds within her music. She is a hopeless romantic, along with being a dreamer, and looks for hope in everything. She wants to fall in love more than anything, and possibly right a song about it. She is very insecure though, and finds much fault in herself. She always sees the best in others though, and is very good at telling how people feel and understanding their side.

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#History ;

Melody was born and raised in Ponyville, and ever since receiving her cutie mark she has aspired to becoming a professional songwriter. She is very close to her father, many call her a daddy's girl. Last year she moved out to live on her own but still stayed close by. Her dad works at his own music shop, where he sells ponies instruments. He often would let her put on a small performance in the shop. Melody discovered her cutie mark after humming a tune she had made up in her mind when her dad was near by. He was thrilled at her lyrics and she suddenly knew what she was good at. Ever since Melody was little, she loved to play outside in Autumn. She became a bit obsessed with the season and was always thrilled when it was Autumn time again. She also grew up in the past with younger twin siblings. They were boy and girl, and quite a bit younger. She was never one to fight with them, and is instead very good with children because of her time filling in for her mother.

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The Roleplayer's Corner

#Nickname ; Grace

#Age ; 16

#Gender ; Female

#How did you find us? ; Sun And Shadows forum

#Sample RP ;

Melody blinked up at the stallion she had known ever since he was a colt. Her heart melted in her chest and she bit her lip nervously. Was this the moment she had been waiting for her whole life, or would it just be yet another disappointment to add to her list? She took a deep breath and blew a stray strand of her mane away from her muzzle before replying. "Are you... are you messing with me right now?" She asked him shakily. She heard out his response, and a small smile expanded across her face. She couldn't believe what she was hearing! The stallion she had a crush on since she was a filly, was finally asking her to be his special somepony.

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[Whammy]

Well, I just sent you a welcome message so why don't we get straight into the profile!

I do have a few suggestions on the formatting here:

1) If you can resize the image to be less than 500 pixels wide, we'd prefer it to be up at the top underneath the name but before anything else instead of an attachment.

2) I might suggest you break the name up to be Melody Dreamer or something like that. Don't have to, just a suggestion...*wonders why we don't have a shrug smiley...*

Anyway, appearance section looks fine, covers everything you need. Personality and history could probably be cleaned up a bit though. They are a little messy to read, especially the history as you kind of keep going back and forth between present and past. I also think you could include a bit more on it as well; that last sentence left me wondering what her mother was doing that made her so busy to need Melody to watch the kids (for example). And the thing about liking autumn could probably be more fleshed out in the personality section with a little more on why she likes it.

So yeah, if you can just clean up the flow a little in personality and history and flesh out a little more on both, I think we'd be good ^_^.